Where do I begin? Things have been really crazy, as I've been traveling and out of Phnom Penh most of the week which left me very little time to update you all on what I've been doing - sorry! A lot has happened, but I'm going to attempt to recap everything...
Trip to the Village
Last week the transition to the new office was complete, officially kicking off the project! The week began with meetings, brainstorming, and general preparation for the project, which of course are not the most exciting tasks, but the fact that work was beginning was enough for me. Later in the week we received a phone call from one of the girls who was previously enrolled in the program telling us that she just had a baby and needed help. The next day a few of us made the long 9 hour bus ride to the village where she lives to provide support and talk to her about how to take care of a baby. It was an incredible experience going into the village, seeing what it's like, and observing the interactions between the Cambodian social workers and the girl. From an outside perspective the instructions given to her might have seemed very simple and obvious - give the baby a bath 2 times a day, make sure she sleeps in a mosquito net, etc. - but for a 19 year old who has had a difficult and traumatic childhood, these things are not innately understood and can be quite overwhelming. After a couple of hours visiting her, we all left, went to sleep, and got back on the bus the next morning for another long journey back to Phnom Penh.
Funny side note about our time in the village - the other intern and I had to get on the back of a moto together which as you can imagine, was well, interesting. We westerners are much bigger in stature than most Cambodians, so where you will see 4 Cambodians on one moto, you don't want to see 4 westerners on one moto. We were trying to get to the house we were visiting, and with all of the rain the roads were extremely muddy making it quite slippery. As I was struggling to not fall off the back of the moto, we passed by a group of people sitting and eating - they said hello, we responded, and then they all proceeded to burst into laughter. While it doesn't do a lot for your self-esteem, I'd imagine it was quite entertaining to see two western girls on the back of a moto which was bouncing up and down as it was struggling to make it through the mud without falling off. Then to build my self-esteem even more, when we were visiting the girl and her baby there were a bunch of adorable kids who were hanging around and laughing hysterically every time I looked at them. After about an hour of these little kids looking and laughing, I asked the Cambodian social worker what they were saying, and he proceeded to tell me that they were laughing at my pointy nose. Gosh it makes you feel awesome about yourself, but it makes a lot of sense. Western noses are much different in shape than people of Asian decent, so for a child who has probably never seen a westerner, a pointy nose would look pretty silly!
Holiday in Sihanoukville
After the trip to the village, I went to the beach in Sihanoukville for a few days with 11 other people living and working here. Everyone had work off this past week because Cambodia pretty much comes to a stand-still to celebrate Pchum Ben, a Buddhist holiday, so we decided to take advantage of the time off and go relax at the beach. It was a lot of fun and was incredible to just sit, read, get a massage on the beach for $5, and sleep. The time made me feel somewhat guilty because I just barely arrived and already I get to go on vacation? Although I felt bad, I did my best to just enjoy it because who knows when I will be able to relax like that again. Work is going to get much busier and with all of these new emotions I've been experiencing and struggling with, it was nice to get away for a few days and just be still.
Back to Reality
After a great time at the beach, it was time to come back to Phnom Penh. My first day back at "work" was one of the coolest days thus far. I got to accompany the girls currently living at the shelter to the water park in the city for a fun day out. Don't really know how to explain it, but it was such an incredible experience getting to play in the water, go down the slides, laugh with the girls as I kept falling and flipping out of the inner tubes as I was going down the slides at a unexpectedly fast pace, and watching them smile and just have an genuinely fun time. To say the least, the day was amazing, and I don't really know how else to explain it.
Now it's back to work on the computer, and at the beginning of next week when life picks up again after the holiday I get to start language tutoring!! I am truly looking forward to learning the language, and have actually gotten rid of most of my nerves and reservations about trying to learn a language that is very different than any I've ever been exposed to before. A few people who have helped teach me a few words have been quite surprised and have told me that I speak it very well and sound like a Cambodian girl! I probably wouldn't go that far, but either way I am excited!
Friday, September 30, 2011
Monday, September 19, 2011
Few Words to Describe How I Feel Right Now.....
All I can say is that right now, two doors down from me, a woman is being used to satisfy the desire of a male tourist...
...I'm literally shaking.
...I'm literally shaking.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
An Ox and a Lexus
What to say, what to say. I've now lived in Phnom Penh for a little over a week and it almost feels like I've been here much longer than that. I don't mean that in a bad way at all, I've just settled in and gotten comfortable faster than I ever expected which I think is in part due to the fact that this place is somewhat familiar to me because of my trip here 4 years ago.
Over the past few days, I've been getting a little more settled in with work and things are really starting to kick into gear which is very exciting. The first couple of months will be a lot of research preparation and information gathering, which is definitely not my favorite part, but it is, of course, key to successful research. I noticed this last week I have somewhat struggled with being motivated to do work and be productive since it is all very independent and I don't have specific hours or places I need to work. Then I realized this is the first time in my life that I haven't been in school and because I'm so used to being in a structured environment with specific assignments, deadlines, schedules, etc. it's been challenging to muster up the same motivation I would have during the school year. Additionally, I've never lived abroad for more than a few weeks, and typically when I'm in another country I'm there on vacation where my body naturally shuts down and relaxes so it can recover from my normally busy life during school. With all of that, I recognized that its going to take some time for me to get into the groove of things and that's ok - I've only been here a little over a week! I think I have such high expectations of myself and because I feel like I've been here so much longer, I keep getting upset with myself that I can't be as productive as I would like! Anyways, it's going to take time to get used to the fact that I am actually living in this place for a while, but soon I will adjust and work will require more from me, and I will be ready to be productive and do my job!
As I've been settling in and seeing more of the city and what life is like here, I've come across a few challenging things. Cambodia is considered a third-world country and there is tremendous poverty throughout the country, however, there are quite a few paradoxes that just blow my mind. You can literally be walking down the street, see an ox pulling a cart of food or other items, and then right next to it see a big Lexus SUV. Or, you can see beat up roads, trash and dead animals in the street, tin shacks with an entire family of 5 living in it, and then see a fancy restaurant or coffee shop with wireless internet or a giant mansion with maybe 1 or 2 people living in it. I understand that there is a lot going on in this country, but for purposes of not getting in to all of that I will simply say, it baffles me that such huge contrasts exist in one place.
Another thing that has just pulled at my heart is that human trafficking is all around me and right in front of my eyes. In the States, everything is hidden and even though you might be walking by a girl with a man who is forcing her to have sex with 10-15 men a day, you would never know it. Here, however, I walk down the street and walk right past a western man with a young asian girl/woman who is very dressed up heading towards an area filled with hotels and apartments of expats/tourists. Every day I walk to get something from the supermarket or go to a restaurant to eat and one block away from where I live I pass by a "karaoke" bar with a line of young girls standing by the front door waiting for men to walk through the door. I don't think I can explain how much my heart aches. Every day I literally walk by girls/women who are currently living through hell and who are forced to have sex with multiple men day in and day out, and there is nothing I can do about it. It's the most difficult thing I've ever been faced with, and I'm not sure what to do other than just pray and do everything in my power to make this research successful. If it's done right, the program will help bring stability to families and communities and will keep some children from undergoing the horrible experiences of the girls and women I walk by every day. I know I cannot protect every child from such injustice, but if what I'm doing here can even help and prevent one child from being trafficked, I will be successful. As I witness human trafficking every day, I have to focus on the hope and potential of the work I am doing and simply use it as motivation to put every ounce of my energy into the project.
I ask that you please pray for the girls I see and don't see who are greatly suffering and being forced to be used to fulfill the sinful desires of some men. Additionally, please pray for those men that they may see God, know the great suffering they are causing, and have the power to overcome their evil desires which are bringing harm to innocent people.
Over the past few days, I've been getting a little more settled in with work and things are really starting to kick into gear which is very exciting. The first couple of months will be a lot of research preparation and information gathering, which is definitely not my favorite part, but it is, of course, key to successful research. I noticed this last week I have somewhat struggled with being motivated to do work and be productive since it is all very independent and I don't have specific hours or places I need to work. Then I realized this is the first time in my life that I haven't been in school and because I'm so used to being in a structured environment with specific assignments, deadlines, schedules, etc. it's been challenging to muster up the same motivation I would have during the school year. Additionally, I've never lived abroad for more than a few weeks, and typically when I'm in another country I'm there on vacation where my body naturally shuts down and relaxes so it can recover from my normally busy life during school. With all of that, I recognized that its going to take some time for me to get into the groove of things and that's ok - I've only been here a little over a week! I think I have such high expectations of myself and because I feel like I've been here so much longer, I keep getting upset with myself that I can't be as productive as I would like! Anyways, it's going to take time to get used to the fact that I am actually living in this place for a while, but soon I will adjust and work will require more from me, and I will be ready to be productive and do my job!
As I've been settling in and seeing more of the city and what life is like here, I've come across a few challenging things. Cambodia is considered a third-world country and there is tremendous poverty throughout the country, however, there are quite a few paradoxes that just blow my mind. You can literally be walking down the street, see an ox pulling a cart of food or other items, and then right next to it see a big Lexus SUV. Or, you can see beat up roads, trash and dead animals in the street, tin shacks with an entire family of 5 living in it, and then see a fancy restaurant or coffee shop with wireless internet or a giant mansion with maybe 1 or 2 people living in it. I understand that there is a lot going on in this country, but for purposes of not getting in to all of that I will simply say, it baffles me that such huge contrasts exist in one place.
Another thing that has just pulled at my heart is that human trafficking is all around me and right in front of my eyes. In the States, everything is hidden and even though you might be walking by a girl with a man who is forcing her to have sex with 10-15 men a day, you would never know it. Here, however, I walk down the street and walk right past a western man with a young asian girl/woman who is very dressed up heading towards an area filled with hotels and apartments of expats/tourists. Every day I walk to get something from the supermarket or go to a restaurant to eat and one block away from where I live I pass by a "karaoke" bar with a line of young girls standing by the front door waiting for men to walk through the door. I don't think I can explain how much my heart aches. Every day I literally walk by girls/women who are currently living through hell and who are forced to have sex with multiple men day in and day out, and there is nothing I can do about it. It's the most difficult thing I've ever been faced with, and I'm not sure what to do other than just pray and do everything in my power to make this research successful. If it's done right, the program will help bring stability to families and communities and will keep some children from undergoing the horrible experiences of the girls and women I walk by every day. I know I cannot protect every child from such injustice, but if what I'm doing here can even help and prevent one child from being trafficked, I will be successful. As I witness human trafficking every day, I have to focus on the hope and potential of the work I am doing and simply use it as motivation to put every ounce of my energy into the project.
I ask that you please pray for the girls I see and don't see who are greatly suffering and being forced to be used to fulfill the sinful desires of some men. Additionally, please pray for those men that they may see God, know the great suffering they are causing, and have the power to overcome their evil desires which are bringing harm to innocent people.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Fourth Day In
Well here I am on my fourth day in Cambodia. It has been an incredible past few days, and surprisingly enough it feels as though I've been here MUCH longer than I actually have!
My emotions quickly changed however when, as I went downstairs, one of the girls (who I hadn't met yet) immediately came up to me and put a bracelet that she had made on my wrist. Then she and another girl motioned me to come into the lobby and told me to pick out a pair of earrings they had made. As soon as I pointed to one, they picked them up and put them in my ears. They were so excited to give me this jewelry and it brought me so much joy - I now wear the bracelet and earrings every day as a reminder and inspiration that hope and joy can still be present in the midst of pain and suffering. The girls immediately took me from having a heavy heart to one filled with joy and hope.
Later, we had our launching lunch with the Project Team and went to the office where we'll be working. Once we got to the office, we actually began to brainstorm and briefly plan our next steps over the next couple of weeks. This day got me very excited to begin working on the project and was the first moment where all of the dreaming I've been doing for the past year came to be reality - I'm actually here in Cambodia, doing the research and work I've been thinking about since last September...an amazing feeling!!
FRIDAY
Friday was my first full day and was actually a very significant day for me. I got to go to the offices where I will be working, one of which is in the shelter where the girls going through treatment are living. Although I've been working to fight human trafficking for the past 3 1/2 years, I have never interacted with or met someone who is recovering from being trafficked - let alone 14-17 year old girls who have undergone this horrific injustice. It took me a while to recognize what a significant moment it was for me, but once I started to connect the terrible facts and images of what their stories and experiences were like, I began to get extremely emotional and had to take deep breaths to maintain composure.My emotions quickly changed however when, as I went downstairs, one of the girls (who I hadn't met yet) immediately came up to me and put a bracelet that she had made on my wrist. Then she and another girl motioned me to come into the lobby and told me to pick out a pair of earrings they had made. As soon as I pointed to one, they picked them up and put them in my ears. They were so excited to give me this jewelry and it brought me so much joy - I now wear the bracelet and earrings every day as a reminder and inspiration that hope and joy can still be present in the midst of pain and suffering. The girls immediately took me from having a heavy heart to one filled with joy and hope.
SATURDAY
After a successful Friday, Saturday was a fabulous day of relaxation, shopping, food, and drinks. I went out to the Olympic Market to try and buy some clothes that are culturally appropriate and aren't soooo hot like the denim I came with! The weather is pretty brutal, although it hasn't been that bad, but it's definitely a constant state of sweating - jealous?!!! Anyways, lesson of the day: if I'm looking for a self-esteem boost, DO NOT try to buy clothes when they are made to fit an asian population. It was quite a hysterical mission - I'd look at a t-shirt and the woman at the stand would look at me and shake her head while proceeding to point to a balloon sized shirt and would say, "here this one work". Yea....I still managed to have some success, but boy was it entertaining!
Anyways, after shopping Catherine (another intern at TG) and I basically spent the rest of the day drinking wine, eating amazing food (where I had a blonde moment of realizing I was using chopsticks upside-down..I was wondering why I was struggling so much), oh and at the end of the day we enjoyed my new favorite obsession - a BLOODY MARY!! I have to say, they are not the best here, but I, nonetheless, got my fix. Overall, my first Saturday in Cambodia was quite enjoyable and filled with lots of fun and great company! I HAVE A FRIEND :) yay!!!
SUNDAY
Another fantastic day! Went to check out the International Christian Assembly with Chris (who essentially was our tour guide when I came to Cambodia 4 years ago with my home church, Lake Avenue) which was great. Loved the worship, which I came to realize was led by a man who's connected to Lake Avenue and knows people I know from there - such a small world! The sermon was also amazing, but the coolest part was the number of different nationalities represented. I don't think I have ever seen so much diversity in one room - absolutely loved it. The rest of the day has been a typical lovely Sunday - went to lunch with a great group of people, then enjoyed some gelato, then had my first experience going to the supermarket and buying groceries, and then my favorite part of the day....I GOT MY AIR CONDITIONER FIXED!! It's actually cool in my room and I'm not sweating more inside than outside!!!! LOVE IT :)
Thursday, September 8, 2011
I've Arrived!!
Well, it's official - I have arrived in Phnom Penh, Cambodia!! Gosh what a crazy journey it has been already... a 14 hour flight from LAX to Hong Kong where I know I ate "western vegetarian" meals, but can't remember what (pretty sure I was half asleep while eating), a short layover where I was tempted to try a Starbucks Caramel Coffee Jelly drink, and then lastly, a 2 hour flight to Phnom Penh filled with more food and of all things, COUNTRY MUSIC (in English)!!!!
It's pretty hard to believe I'm actually here, and I think it hit me for the first time that I'm going to be living in Cambodia for 10 months as I was looking at the aerial view coming into Phnom Penh International Airport. CRAZY!!
My favorite parts of the day, however, came after the flights. The coolest thing ever was the man from the US Embassy waiting at the bottom of the escalators, right after I got off the plane, with a little sign that said "Brianna Hodge"...I wanted to take a picture so badly, but I felt like that was a super dorky thing to do so I had to restrain myself. From that point on, it just got better - the man took my information, cut the lines, and got my Visa in a second! By far the easiest experience I've ever had at an airport - all I had to do was stand back and watch. :)
Then the man drove me to the hotel, and no kidding, I was fearing for my life and the life of everyone around me the entire drive over. There are definitely some lanes and street lights to direct traffic, but let's just say it's a free for all and people just go where they want, when they want. One lady came out of no where on a moto and well, our car either actually hit her or was less than an inch from doing so...ridiculous! Needless to say I was extremely glad to get out of that car!
All in all, the day has been great and I'm so excited to be starting this journey. It's pretty surreal that after a year of dreaming and planning, I'm finally here! It's been a struggle to stay awake so I can adjust to the time, but with the help of a dinner gathering with staff and interns from Transitions Global, the day hasn't been bad at all.
So far, so good - now it's time to try to get some solid sleep....let's hope my gift of sleeping whenever and wherever will do me well tonight and I won't be waking up at 3am!!
It's pretty hard to believe I'm actually here, and I think it hit me for the first time that I'm going to be living in Cambodia for 10 months as I was looking at the aerial view coming into Phnom Penh International Airport. CRAZY!!
My favorite parts of the day, however, came after the flights. The coolest thing ever was the man from the US Embassy waiting at the bottom of the escalators, right after I got off the plane, with a little sign that said "Brianna Hodge"...I wanted to take a picture so badly, but I felt like that was a super dorky thing to do so I had to restrain myself. From that point on, it just got better - the man took my information, cut the lines, and got my Visa in a second! By far the easiest experience I've ever had at an airport - all I had to do was stand back and watch. :)
Then the man drove me to the hotel, and no kidding, I was fearing for my life and the life of everyone around me the entire drive over. There are definitely some lanes and street lights to direct traffic, but let's just say it's a free for all and people just go where they want, when they want. One lady came out of no where on a moto and well, our car either actually hit her or was less than an inch from doing so...ridiculous! Needless to say I was extremely glad to get out of that car!
All in all, the day has been great and I'm so excited to be starting this journey. It's pretty surreal that after a year of dreaming and planning, I'm finally here! It's been a struggle to stay awake so I can adjust to the time, but with the help of a dinner gathering with staff and interns from Transitions Global, the day hasn't been bad at all.
So far, so good - now it's time to try to get some solid sleep....let's hope my gift of sleeping whenever and wherever will do me well tonight and I won't be waking up at 3am!!
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